SERVICES
Couples Therapy
I provide couples therapy for partners throughout California via secure video sessions.
My practice is designed for couples caught in familiar, painful cycles: the pursue-withdraw pattern, communication patterns that seem to repeat, the partner who over-functions and the partner who checks out, the fights that are never really about the dishes. Whether you're trying to rebuild trust after a rupture or simply tired of having the same argument in different clothes, we'll work on understanding what's actually driving the disconnection and building a relationship where both of you can show up fully.
Who this is for.
This work is best suited for couples who are:
✓ Willing to look at their own role in the cycle, not just their partner's
✓ Ready to explore uncomfortable emotions and patterns together
✓ Interested in understanding why the conflict happens, not just how to stop the fighting
✓ Open to talking about feelings, vulnerability, and attachment dynamics
✓ Tired of repeating the same argument and ready to try something different
My Approach
I use an integrative approach, which means I draw from multiple therapeutic modalities based on what will actually help your relationship:
Gottman Method — Grounded in four decades of research on what actually makes relationships succeed or fail, the Gottman Method gives couples a precise framework for understanding their cycle: what's triggering it, how it escalates, and what interrupts it. I draw on Gottman concepts including the Four Horsemen (criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling and their antidotes), turning toward vs. turning away, and what effective repair looks like in practice. I am trained in the Gottman Method.
Attachment Theory — Understanding how each partner's early relationships created the blueprint they bring into this one, and how those two blueprints interact
Relational Psychodynamic Therapy — Exploring the unconscious patterns each of you brings to conflict, particularly around caretaking, vulnerability, and fear of abandonment
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) — Practical tools for interrupting reactive cycles, challenging unhelpful narratives about each other, and building new communication skills
Compassion-Focused Therapy — Learning to extend the same understanding to your partner's protective patterns that you'd want extended to your own
Some sessions will focus on what's happening right now: a fight from this week, a boundary that got crossed, a moment neither of you handled well. Other sessions will dig into the deeper patterns: why this particular disagreement always escalates the same way, what each of you learned early about closeness and conflict, how those histories are colliding.
I follow the relationship's lead and adjust based on what's actually helping.
What We'll Work On
Therapy is tailored to your specific needs, but common themes include:
Understanding the cycle you keep falling into and what each of you is protecting when it starts
Rebuilding trust and safety after a betrayal, rupture, or period of disconnection
Shifting out of pursue-withdraw or over-functioning/under-functioning dynamics
Learning to communicate needs directly instead of through criticism, shutdown, or silent resentment
Understanding how each partner's attachment history shows up in the relationship — and stops being a mystery to the other
Rebuilding intimacy and closeness without either partner losing themselves in the process
Getting Started.
Step 1: Book a Free Consultation
We'll have a brief 15-minute phone call to see if we're a good match. I’m happy to answer any questions you have at this point and share more about my approach to therapy.
Step 2: Schedule Your First Session
If we all feel it's a fit, we'll schedule your first full session and I'll send you intake paperwork.
Step 3: Begin Therapy
Show up as you are. We'll figure out the rest together.
How Therapy Works
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How Therapy Works ~
Format
Weekly 80-minute video sessions via a secure, HIPAA-compliant Zoom platform. No downloads or special software required.
Location
I'm licensed in California and see couples throughout the state. Sessions are conducted entirely online, so you can meet from wherever feels comfortable and private for both of you.
Frequency
Most couples meet weekly, especially in the earlier stages of the work. Consistency matters when you're trying to interrupt a long-standing cycle. We can adjust frequency as things stabilize.
Duration
Some couples work with me for a few months to move through a specific rupture or conflict pattern. Others stay longer to do deeper work on communication, trust, and intimacy. There's no required commitment. We'll discuss what makes sense for you both during the initial consultation.
Your Questions, Answered
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No. My role isn't to decide who's right in a given argument. It's to help you both understand the cycle you're in and what's driving it. Almost every couple I work with is contributing to the pattern in some way, even when it doesn't feel that way in the moment.
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Yes. I have completed Gottman Method Level 1 training, which is one of the most research-backed approaches to couples therapy available. It's built on decades of research by Drs. John and Julie Gottman on what makes relationships last and what causes them to break down. In practice, that means I use specific frameworks for understanding your cycle, naming what's happening when it escalates, and building concrete skills for repair and reconnection. I use it as part of an integrative approach alongside attachment theory and relational work.
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Sometimes, depending on what the work calls for. If we do individual sessions, I'll be clear with you both about how confidentiality works so there are no surprises.
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Yes. Individual therapy focuses on your own patterns and history. Couples therapy focuses on the relationship itself and the cycle the two of you create together. Some couples do both at once. Others start with couples work and add individual sessions later if it's useful.
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That's common, and it doesn't mean the work won't be effective. A lot of hesitant partners come around once they see the first session isn't about being blamed. I'm happy to talk to both of you beforehand about what to expect.
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Not at all. Some of the most effective work happens before a relationship is in crisis, when there's still enough goodwill and energy to build new patterns rather than repair a lot of damage first.
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It depends on what brought you in. Some couples see real shifts within a few months, like less escalation, faster repair after conflict, and more direct communication. Deeper work, particularly after a betrayal or with long-standing attachment patterns, typically takes longer. We'll check in regularly about what's working.
Other related conditions we can work on together:
“Love is an action. Never simply a feeling.”
-bell hooks
